settling

Subject: Re: [acb-l] settling

To All Settlers...and those who may still be unsettled,

 

As I settle myself in my office chair this morning, I find that I am willing to settle for a little distraction before settling down to attempt to settle several client needs. 

Although I do recall using the expression many times, in my heart of hearts I really have never settled for anything.  Oh sure, I've heard myself say, "I had to settle for second best", or "We settled for the ham and cheese sandwich, since they were out of Turkey", but that's quite different than "settling" on how I conduct my life. 

I have never settled for living in a certain neighborhood because I couldn't afford to live somewhere else.  I've never settled for my current job because I couldn't convince anyone to pay me to turn my dream jobs into reality. 

I've never settled for taking a bus to work rather than driving myself. 

I guess I just don't get it.  What are we supposed to be settling on? 

Don't we just deal with life?  Where I find myself in life is based on a gazillion events, most of which I had no control over.  But even if I made some dumb decisions, I am not settling for my present situation.  It just is.  It's where I am.  Some things I do for myself that I might be better off having done for me, and some things I have done for me that I could do for myself.  That's not settling.  That's Life. 

When we are working with a client we do not say, "You will just have to settle on reading with a magnifier", or "You will have to settle on having your mail read to you".  We say, "here are your choices, given your situation".  And when a client chooses to walk into walls rather than be seen with a white cane, we don't think that she has settled for this behavior.  She is doing the best she can do with her current state of being.  As a rehab teacher, my job is to offer her better information and instruction.  But she is going to process what I do and make her own choices.  that's not settling.  That's doing the best she can do right now. 

And isn't that what all of us do? 

 

Carl Jarvis