How can we really become effective, partners in our world if we don't deal honestly with our limitations as blind people, as well as our strengths?
While I give credit to the NFB for opening my mind to the belief that I could be a productive person, enjoying life and making meaningful contributions, I also understand that they set us up.
Catch slogans are okay in building up folks spirits, but saying, "The blind leading the blind," implies that we do not need anyone else. The Independent Blind Movement tells us that we can push away sighted assistance and go it alone.
I understand that it was an over reaction to the world blind people once found themselves in, being overly controlled by sighted agencies and family members. But in the long run it has done us a disservice. We could have achieved the same goals by preaching interdependence, and today we would probably have a healthier relationship to our sighted neighbors.
Carl Jarvis
----- Original Message -----From: Miriam VieniSent: Saturday, January 26, 2013 7:06 AMSubject: RE: My call to SchumerCarl,
All those things you mention are the things that so many blind people don't
mention or, even seem to think about, when discussing how they function and
their expectations of how other people should function. I probably mentioned
that my husband was seventeen years older than I so he was a well
established functioning adult blind man when I met him. I know that he
received all sorts of help from sighted associates at work. He always
dressed beautifully. Someone helped him choose those sport jackets and
trousers and ties that he wore to work. He'd been married previously to a
totally blind woman. But she co owned a two family house with her sighted
sister. When we married and then bought hour house in the suburbs, (buying
the house where we did is one of the dumbest decisions we made), my mother
used to visit almost every weekend. And then there were the sighted
neighbors who had children with whom my daughter played. When my very active
little girl got splinters in her hand, I'd ask my neighbor to take them out.
Back then, women were at home and there were people around. But after my
husband's death, when my daughter was an adult, she still wanted to believe
that we had been this very independent blind couple. It had to do with her
defense against all those people who indicated to her, in one way or another
when she was a child, that they felt sorry for her because she had blind
parents. And I remember having this discussion with her in which I tried to
say that we never could had survived, had there not been sighted people
around to give a hand when necessary. This fact doesn't diminish our
accomplishments, but it needs to be recognized.
Miriam
________________________________
From: blind-democracy-bounces@octothorp.org
[mailto:blind-democracy-bounces@octothorp.org] On Behalf Of Carl Jarvis
Sent: Saturday, January 26, 2013 12:23 AM
To: Blind Democracy Discussion List
Subject: Re: My call to Schumer
I never saw myself as a super blind man. I actually was trying to prove
that I was as good as my sighted neighbors. And when I was young and my
senses were sharp and my sense of direction better than the average, I was a
good match in many things. But I do remember, looking back, that I did play
down the areas where sight was critical. Sure, I could mow my own lawn,
wash the windows, vacuum the floors, do the laundry, take my Braille grocery
list and my grocery cart and hike off to Safeway...and get my groceries.
That last little item is not something a totally blind man is going to do
without sighted help no matter how clever he is.
I always called ahead and was met by an employee who walked around the store
with me, putting the items in my cart.
As a single parent, I mentioned before that I cooked the meals, did the
laundry and kept the books...well, not entirely. My eldest daughter,
fifteen at the time, read me the bills and the amounts. I Brailed them out
and kept a ledger, but I could not have done this without that vital sighted
help.
On the job I did many amazing things, for a blind man...according to sighted
folks around me. I rode the bus to and from work. Of course so did many of
them. I taught classes in food management, Braille, physical education and
even some O&M when no one was looking. "Remarkable! Truly amazing!" folks
would say. But they were doing the same things. I never thought them to be
super sighted people. And what they chose to overlook, and much of the time
I did too, was just how much I depended upon my secretary to give me visual
information. She would check out my office and advise me if I had spills of
coffee on tables. She would do the same regarding my ties and shirts. She
would tidy up the places that I'd overlooked, and arrange the office
conference table when I was expecting to have meetings. She was at my side,
reading stuff that we could not translate into Braille. And she gave me her
impressions of the people I dealt with.
I could go on for pages, but as you can see, I was an interdependent blind
man, not an independent one.
Carl Jarvis
----- Original Message -----
From: Miriam Vieni <mailto:miriamvieni@optonline.net>
To: 'Blind Democracy Discussion List'
<mailto:blind-democracy@octothorp.org>
Sent: Friday, January 25, 2013 7:39 PM
Subject: RE: My call to Schumer
I think that perhaps blind people take sighted help for granted, but
I'm not
sure they all realize they're doing it. I also think that there is
this
image of super blind person, that they want to fill. But there are
people
who really don't realize how much help they're getting from others.
Miriam
-----Original Message-----
From: blind-democracy-bounces@octothorp.org
[mailto:blind-democracy-bounces@octothorp.org] On Behalf Of ted
chittenden
Sent: Friday, January 25, 2013 9:37 PM
To: Blind Democracy Discussion List
Subject: RE: My call to Schumer
I think that a lot of people, both blind and sighted, take a lot for
granted. Sighted people take for granted that they will still
receive
benefits even while they demand that government cut costs. Blind
people
often take for granted the actual assistance they receive from
others (in
fact, it could be argued that taking that assistance for granted is
part of
the NFB philosophy--except that I have noticed ACB members doing it
too)
without realizing that the assistance they are getting is not
necessarily
available to everybody else. I think this taking of the help that
others
provide us for granted causes those who provide the assistance to
feel that
they have bben used and reluctant to offer any more assistance in
the
future.
--
Ted Chittenden
Every story has at least two sides if not more.
---- Miriam Vieni <miriamvieni@optonline.net> wrote:
Carl,
Yes, and I mention the details because all too often, blind people
who have
easily available sighted help, don't mention it and blind people who
don't,
and who have to struggle to find ways to get stuff done, feel as if
maybe
there's something wrong with them or they're doing something wrong.
There's
so much emphasis on independence and capability, and now-a-days, use
of
technology, that a lot of times when blind people talk to each other
about
their lives, they just omit the difficult details. We have a
situation here
in Nassau County where the private company that is now running our
paratransit system, began occasionally using a different color, very
quiet
van. Apparently, some of our LICB leadership encountered this, but
it never
occurred to them to post the information on their email list or
their
website. People with a bit of partial vision, could miss their rides
because
they're used to white vans. And Everyone is used to vans with very
loud
motors so a totally blind person can locate the van, even when it's
idling.
Somehow, it never occurred to anyone to post the information about
these new
vans that are occasionally substituted for the regular vans which
look
totally different from what we're used to and which you can't hear.
I can't
understand the self centeredness and denial of these people. I
compare this
to my husband, Fred, who was probably one of the most skillful blind
travelers I've ever known. He had an incredible sense of direction
and
fantastic hearing, and this ability to tell me if he passed a
telephone
pole. But he understood that traveling around New York City and its
suburbs
is incredibly challenging for blind people. I remember how, when we
went to
meetings in the city, he'd always ask folks "How was your trip here
today?"
And people appreciated that. As competent as they may have been at
getting
around, it helped to talk about it. It was a recognition of what we
all had
to deal with. So, getting back to debit card receipts, it's easy to
buy
stuff that way. You don't have to identify currency. But then you
have all
these little receipts.
Miriam
________________________________
From: blind-democracy-bounces@octothorp.org
[mailto:blind-democracy-bounces@octothorp.org] On Behalf Of Carl
Jarvis
Sent: Friday, January 25, 2013 6:54 PM
To: Blind Democracy Discussion List
Subject: Re: My call to Schumer
Miriam,
Like you, I am not mathematically inclined. As a single parent, I
also kept
Braille notes stapled to my receipts and a Braille ledger. My
eldest
daughter did spend a few minutes each week reading statements and
identifying things I needed to Braille. My trade off with her was
that I
did all the laundry and cooking. She helped with the bills and
sometimes
watched the two younger children.
We got along, but I have to tell you that I would not trade Cathy
for any of
those "good old days".
A sighted spouse, especially one you are really attached to, is one
huge
advantage.
Carl Jarvis
----- Original Message -----
From: Miriam Vieni <mailto:miriamvieni@optonline.net>
To: 'Blind Democracy Discussion List'
<mailto:blind-democracy@octothorp.org>
Sent: Friday, January 25, 2013 12:55 PM
Subject: RE: My call to Schumer
Well, this is easier for sighted people because they can glance
through all
of those receipts and check them out against the balance in the
checking
account, etc. I make braille notes of those receipts, checks,
deposits,
withdrawals, etc. I use my CCTV to go through my bank statement and
it isn't
easy to do. Of course, the fact that I've always been
"mathematically
challenged" doesn't help.
Miriam
________________________________
From: blind-democracy-bounces@octothorp.org
[mailto:blind-democracy-bounces@octothorp.org] On Behalf Of Carl
Jarvis
Sent: Friday, January 25, 2013 1:14 PM
To: ceverett@dslextreme.com; Blind Democracy Discussion List
Subject: Re: My call to Schumer
Claude,
Even a Neanderthal, like me is going more and more to debit card
use. Up
until about two years ago we would draw our operating money for the
month,
divide it into compartments for food, gas, etc. Another draw from
our
business account was taken to cover client and business expenses.
Nowadays we just keep a log and enter in the information. We have a
second
debit card for our business.
So if we are out on client business and stop for lunch, out comes
the
business debit card. We include tax and tip. If the service is
really bad,
the tip is almost nonexistent. I have been known to take great
pleasure in
hearing a wait person pawing around among the dirty dishes, looking
for the
tip they are sure we left on the table. Usually that's the only
time we saw
them at our table after dropping off our food.
We also have a business credit card and another for our personal
use. These
cards are used from time to time, but are always paid up by the end
of the
month, to avoid interest charges.
This works well if you are as disciplined as my wife. Cathy is very
detail
focused. She keeps lists of the lists she keeps.
Her sister has three credit cards, all of them maxed. She is
trapped by the
Capitalistic system and will never get paid off.
Carl Jarvis
----- Original Message -----
From: Claude Everett <mailto:ceverett@dslextreme.com>
To: 'Blind Democracy Discussion List'
<mailto:blind-democracy@octothorp.org>
Sent: Friday, January 25, 2013 9:22 AM
Subject: RE: My call to Schumer
Miriam,
You said: "Soon, people won't be using cash anymore anyway. " I
tend to
differ, there are small purchases, tips, and other transactions,
which will
still need cash.
Claude Everett
"First of all: what is work?
Work is of two kinds:
first, altering the position of matter at or near the earth's
surface
relatively to other such matter;
second, telling other people to do so.
The first kind is unpleasant and ill paid; the second is pleasant
and
highly paid."
From The collection of essays "In Praise of Idleness" by Bertrand
Russell
-----Original Message-----
From: blind-democracy-bounces@octothorp.org
[mailto:blind-democracy-bounces@octothorp.org] On Behalf Of Miriam
Vieni
Sent: Friday, January 25, 2013 9:02 AM
To: 'Blind Democracy Discussion List'
Subject: RE: My call to Schumer
Well, they say that phone calls are more effective than letters and
personal
letters are more effective than petitions, etc. I think, if they get
enough
petitions from enough groups which appear to represent huge numbers
of
people, maybe they'll be influenced. Just think about the legal
opinion on
accessible money and see where this has gotten us so far. Several
private
companies made money from government contracts given to them to
study how to
implement the decision. How many years ago was this? And this was a
legal
decision in response to a suit. Soon, people won't be using cash
anymore
anyway.
Miriam
________________________________
From: blind-democracy-bounces@octothorp.org
[mailto:blind-democracy-bounces@octothorp.org] On Behalf Of Carl
Jarvis
Sent: Friday, January 25, 2013 10:37 AM
To: Blind Democracy Discussion List
Subject: Re: My call to Schumer
Miriam,
From one frustrated person to another:
Change the name and the State, and your experience could have been
mine.
While my congressman, Norm Dicks, did always answer me, it was with
form
letters or discussions about issues he was fighting for "on my
behalf".
Back in the days when you had to actually sit down at a typewriter
and pound
out your concerns, the stationary that came back with the ambiguous
reply,
was on good quality paper. For a while I thought I'd save them
until I had
enough to paper my office wall, but the quality went down to the
point that
it would be embarrassing to plaster them where anyone could see.
I've often thought that this made a statement even before anyone
realized
that we, the people, were so insignificant that our representatives
could
cut corners by reducing the quality of their stationary, just as
they
reduced their involvement in our affairs.
Carl Jarvis
----- Original Message -----
From: Miriam Vieni <mailto:miriamvieni@optonline.net>
To: 'Blind Democracy Discussion List'
<mailto:blind-democracy@octothorp.org>
Sent: Friday, January 25, 2013 7:08 AM
Subject: My call to Schumer
I said that I'd received this email indicating that he's supporting
cuts in
social security and asked if it were true. Since the email didn't
include
details, only saying that he'd "put cuts on the table", The aide
with whom I
talked said that this was just a rumor and that he wasn't in favor
of any
cuts and said something about how they were dealing with
reconciliation now,
whatever that meant. I didn't even want to get into the filibuster
or
medicare and medicaid cuts. But I did say that rumors often had some
reality
behind them and that even our President was supporting this and I
then
talked a bit about my own personal situation. The aide was polite,
did not
sound especially warm or sympathetic, asked for my zip code, and
said she'd
relay my concerns to the Senator. I did manage to include the fact
that
there are corporations that pay no taxes, and wealthy people who are
doing
very well, and that the Democratic party is not fulfilling its
traditional
mandate. The experience reinforced why I tend not to make these
phone calls.
They are frustrating and I don't usually feel like I've accomplished
anything.
Miriam
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