So, here's the plan:
Fans Seize Control Of Baseball.
Impossible? Unethical? Out of the question? The amazing truth is that once upon a time, long, long ago, fans did control the game! In those far distant times, towns and local factories sponsored teams and the "Big Game", was big because dad or uncle or an older brother took their position in the field or at bat. We actually knew many of the players! They were us! And our loyalty was with, "our team".
today we don't know nobody. The owners live in Tokyo or Miami, and the players come from Tulsa or Caracas.
But we gather together by the thousands to, "cheer the home town team".
Today, Baseball is divided into four camps: owners, by far the smallest group; players, including officials, managers and the like; agents, sponsors and worthless junk vendors, including baseball card manufacturers; and fans, by far the larger number.
Here's the rub. Everybody is making money off of the game except the fans. Us Fans now get to pay for what once was free entertainment. We get no money and we get no say. We just get to "enjoy" the game, for a price. Indeed, our name has taken on a new meaning.
FANS: Financing All National Sports.
The time has come for Fans to stand together, to organize. As the self appointed president of the, ASSOCIATION of ROOTERS and FANS (ARF), I humbly present my PLAN and call upon Fans everywhere to unite.
THE PLAN:
1. All players will receive a base salary(no pun intended)
2. Norms will be established. Incentives and bonus' will be paid above and beyond the base salary according to a production schedule.
3. Regions will be established. When a team claims to represent a particular town or area, it will actually have to draw ALL of its players, coaches, managers and sponsors from that assigned region. Any players coming in by raft must establish residency in the area they wish to play.
4. All salaries will be paid from monies paid by sponsors and vendors. Fans will attend games free of charge. However, ushers may pass a contribution plate among attendees for a free-will offering.
5. Leagues will be established within the same time zone, where ever possible. Inter-league competition will be minimal--mostly occurring during post season playoffs.
6. Players will no longer be owned. They will be employed. They may not be traded. If they wish to play for another team, they must relocate to that region and establish residency.
7. All baseball cards must be sold individually in packages of bubble gum, that flat, nasty hard stuff that chews like sweet cardboard. The buyer must actually show proof of having chewed the gum before the card can be traded. (bubble blowing is optional)
Fans, we can do it! Remember,back in 1776, the owners, sponsors and blood-suckers told George Washington that he could not change the rules. But George brought the game back home. We can do it too.
Let's stand together and shout our proud name, "ARF, ARF, ARF."
Curious Carl
www.curiouscarlscorner.blogspot.com
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